Oh, DP, what will we learn at your feet? Quite a bit, actually. We understand DP’s been studying basic forces. Firktion stops ears. Stackfirk! Not to pick apart a second-grader’s science homework, really, that’s almost cheating. But for the low price of 45 (cents? I hope so) you can have a piece of America’s political […]
Deep in the heart of San Antonio, there is a Goodwill. It’s as polished as a downtown department store, and even has a coffee bar built in. We swore we’d find that Goodwill and we would shop at that Goodwill. And we did. But they actually had standards, so we went off to go to […]
So…it’s come to this. Tossed aside, locked behind glass, hair shaved off. We’ve all been there. This is rock bottom. Actually, if you’re discarded, shaved, encased, and a clown, that’s just slightly worse. I think this might be the most depressing creature I’ve ever encountered in a thrift store, she most have been pretty in […]
The question is not “why are these children crying in pain on a block of wood,” but “why did someone feel the need to SCULPT them?” What artist was driven, on seeing five anguished moppets, to craft them out of plaster painted to look like sandstone? Was it something that they did? “You there, climb […]
The most amazing thing about this angel–well, maybe she’s not an angel, maybe she’s some sort of garden fairy, from a garden where the bay hedge is shaped into a grinning skull, the roses chant weird arcane syllables, and the basil creeps up and ask you for change, definitely not the kind of garden that […]
So majestic! So joyful! Just seeing them brings me back to my childhood, watching the dolphins frolic through the plaster of paris, painted foam timelessly moored to the “water” around them. They were nothing if not optimistic. Actually, they were nothing if not nailed down, but we can’t hold that against them. You can almost […]
“No, no, you can trust me. There ain’t no giant snails here. Not a one. Now you just sit yourself down here…that’s it, real slow like. Just…relax, for, you know, five, ten minutes.” “You know I’m you’re friend. Rabbits don’t lie, I’m your BESTEST friend. I ain’t never fed no-one to no giant snail. That’s […]
After the magnificence that was the South Flores Texas Thrift Store, we knew that anything else would be a pale second. Out of a sense of duty, we went down the other, lesser thrift stores on South Flores, taking a detour down Military Drive because South San Antonio is kind of like the Bermuda Triangle, […]
Just past the pretty lady in the egg-carton dress, we stumbled over this Boschian nightmare. The fine meaning of this piece eludes me. I’m pretty sure that it involves Voldemort somehow, and that the angelic vision that is Cyndi Lauper is using her apotropaic powers to protect the huddled forms of Ignorance and Want (or […]
Oh, Texas Thrift Store. You amaze me. I thought, growing up in a town with a dozen vintage stores within a block of each other, I’d seen–really experienced–thrift. You taught me otherwise. You taught me to fear thrift, respect thrift. This chain is astonishing. Four huge locations, each the size of a grocery store, each […]