I wish that Dr. Seuss had written and illustrated a book of love poetry. Because right now, this is all I have. Oh lady, play upon your lute For Summer shall come soon And flowers rise some ten feet high, They grow quite large in June. Oh lady, sing a little song, About the flowers […]
It was a hard year, 1973. There was a terrible drought, Watergate was wreaking havok on public trust in the government, we lost Noel Coward, and got “Wheel of Fortune.” But mostly, it was the year the frogs stood up and started picking. We didn’t think much about it at first. Truth be told, it […]
Weight of the world got you down? Think you have problems? Think you’re job’s not worth two thin dimes? Cat crawl into your car’s exhaust pipe, now it backfires hairballs and the mice are getting into the salad? Wife left you for some guy in advertising? Some girl in advertising? Doctor look at your x-ray […]
First dwarf: Round about the tree stump go, Ingredients within it stow! Statuette of angel toss, Without a hand, for it was lost, A picture that was made of corks, and rubber-banded, unmatched forks. Second dwarf: A picture of a former love, in the tree stump try to shove– with skin a most unnatural hue, […]
“Commissioner…we’ve run out of options. The Joker AND Two-Face have joined forces with the Shredder and Lucy from ‘Peanuts.’ It’s a perfect storm of villainy.” “What about our inside agent?” “…We have an inside agent?” “Of course we do. Why else do you think the League of Supreme Evil keeps renewing the Riddler’s contract.” “That […]
Or not so little, but definitely different. Both of these little guys were on the brick-a-brack shelf (or, “crapstack”) at Thrift Land on Stassney near I35. Both…well, I’m not sure but the authorial intent, we’ll just leave it at that. “On a winter night, when the moon rises over a gloomy sea and it’s so […]
“Mommy said you were going to work, Daddy.” “Um…yeah. Yes, Jake, Daddy’s getting ready to go out the door. Oh…I see you got all dressed up. That’s…nice.” “You said I could come with you some day. I could come with you and see your desk and where you work all day, and we could have […]
“Morning, Clem.” “Morning, Dale.” “Gotta say, Clem, the pond’s looking a touch strange this morning.” “How’d you mean, strange, Dale?” “I’d say its looking a little hellish, actually.” “Hellish, you say, Dale?” “I do say, Clem, I do say. A bit like the fires of hell come bubbling up, Clem. It’s giving the pigeons quite […]
“Captain, the crew’s talking among themselves, they say that no good’ll come from this voyage. They’re saying the ship’s a’cursed.” “Belay that kind of prattle. The HMS Conchiolin is the prettiest ship on these eastern seas. T’ain’t no ship as charming as she. Why the day she first set sailed, they said, ‘That’s a right […]
This photo was taken just moments before the carnage began. It was a happy community. When we were first baked, we really came together. Yeah, your roller skates got kind of tangled up in the cheese, and maybe there were…mushrooms…on the north side of the neighborhood, but it was an affordable place to live, and […]