ThriftHorror

Recent Posts

  • Interrupting your silence for an update!
  • Rabbit Season!!
  • Dolphins in Bondage
  • From the ‘Creepy Little Dead Girl’ Files
  • Putti: Creepy as F***

Recent Comments

  • Hannah Theresa Weyland on Just stand still.
  • Brunettepet on Can’t sleep, birdhouse will eat me
  • hotclaws on And another enigma.
  • Brunettepet on Well and truly fired
  • Brunettepet on A beautiful mystery!

Tags

"handicrafts" (tm) 12 Days 2010 12days2011 12days2012 12days2013 12days2014 aminals amorphous blobs angels bad art Bears Best Of biohazard bottles broked candles ceramics children Christmas clowns Country Crafts DIY dolls don't wear that! for the kids furries Halloween Holiday Posts horrors huh? it must be bunnies Just Cool juxtapositions kittens moments My Funny Valentine? Not PC NSFW plates puppies San Antonio shelfpig shell art Weird Religion

Best of Thrift

  • Next To New Consignment
  • Top Drawer Thrift
  • Treasure City Thrift

Blogness

  • Rewind Knits and Crochets
  • Thrift Madness
  • Thrift Store Adventures
  • Thrift Store Horror
  • Yardsaling to Adventure!

Links

  • RSS Feed
  • Thrifthorror on Facebook
  • Thrifthorror on Pinterest
  • ThriftHorror on Twitter

Bloodshed and mayhem with the Bergers

Utah historians rarely, if ever, speak of the Berger family Christmas ski trip and massacre. Oh sure, it’s entered the popular lexicon, like Donner Family and Manson Family. It’s probably in the Urban Dictionary, which has more entries than the Oxford English and, really, is more consise and reliable for business use. Lexicography aside, the year 2009 was not a good one for the Bergers, as shown by Jem, the only living witness.

1-1-13BluePlate5

The dark day began when little Tanner wore his mickey mouse ears to play in the snow.

1-1-13BluePlate1

Judy, in a bid to draw attention from her bizarre sideways face, shoved him to the ground as both an outsider and somewhat dorky. When Jeffey, who was both five years old and easily manipulated, and had a beard (and so, like Judy, could use a good scapegoat), threw the first snowball, not even pear-hatted and spider-armed Uncle Barry could stop the mob mentality, and soon Tanner’s face was covered with snow and blood, his body half-buried in the ice.

The day would only get stranger.

1-1-13BluePlate4

“Hah HAH! I will use my HOLOGRAPHIC SNOWMAN PROJECTOR to disrupt this yuletide trist! Go, my snowbeast!”

1-1-13BluePlate3

“Oh, whatever, it’s just the holographic snowman again. Come on, you’re a Berger, I’m a Berger, let’s make a patty-melt.”

Santa, horrified, drifts past in the cold mountain sky, knowing truly, for the first time, what had been growing in his heart for centuries, like a tiny spore of Penicillium in a cream cheese doomed to become a Roququefort Bleu: There ARE no good boys and girls.

1-1-13BluePlate2

Also, on the subject of Santa, does anyone thing this guy looks more like a walrus than a jolly old elf? Or one of Rankin/Bass’s spiders from the 1977 “Hobbit“?

1-1-13SASCPlate1

 

I’ve been thinking “Christmas Spider,” but then I watched that damned Hobbit cartoon when I was three and never, never forgot…

Berger Family Massacre: Savers on South Lamar. Santa Plate: Salvation Army on South Congress. Austin.

December 28, 2013   TV's Jacob
Uncategorized 12days2013, Christmas, Holiday Posts, plates

Related Posts

  • Rabbit Season!!
    Rabbit Season!!
  • Putti: Creepy as F***
    Putti: Creepy as F***
  • LET THERE BE….LIPS!
    LET THERE BE….LIPS!
×

  • Creepy Mrs Claus and Goth Choirboys
  • Short and weird

One Response to “Bloodshed and mayhem with the Bergers”

  1. Reply
    Brunettepet / 29 Dec 2013 11:14am #

    I love the green Berger documenting the mayhem for posterity!

Leave a Reply

Cancel

  • (will not be published)
Copyright © 2013 ThriftHorror - Things From Beyond the Bargain Bin: Monday, Wednesday, Friday, powered by Wordpress
7ads6x98y