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Someone bought this?

Honestly, I feel bad sometimes that the majority of Thrifthorror posts are basically making fun of preteen art, and really, who among us was a master craftsperson at age six? So I treasure the occasional commercial product that is freakishly weird enough for inclusion. Like the head wizard.

1-14-12SvrsN-Headwizard1

Now, the head wizard, in its natural form, is a quirky little scalp massager. Does it have magical powers? Perhaps, perhaps not. It does vibrate, which might have been seen in medieval times as some sort of alliance with Satan, but now, not so much. If you visit their website, it’s really not that peculiar. It’s the post-market additions that really sing.

The Savers Head Wizard…him I would not want on my scalp.

1-14-12SvrsN-Headwizard3

Like some sort of strange jellyfish, or a particularly boneheaded monster from Dungeons and Dragons, the Head Wizard (Uncommon, City/plains, % appearing in Lair: 40%) drifts along passively, until it’s able to find its pray and latch on. In a manner of minutes–well, months–it vibrates its pray to death, and then proceeds to devour its kill.

One head wizard isn’t really that big a deal, but they used to come in drifts of hundreds. At least until they were all but driven to extinction during the copper shortage of the aughts. Now, if you see a single, maimed specimen like this one, you’re one of the lucky few.

1-14-12SvrsN-Headwizard2

Savers on north Lamar, Austin

May 3, 2013   TV's Jacob
Uncategorized
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  • It’s got a pretty mouth/to swallow you whole
  • It’s cheerful…maybe TOO cheerful.

4 Responses to “Someone bought this?”

  1. Reply
    Kim / 3 May 2013 12:57pm #

    Looks like one of those quack medicine devices they sell on “Oddities” – you know, the ones you plug in and it gives some almost-Victorian woman a thrill, or something from “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”. I wouldn’t touch it in the store, let alone put it on my head!

  2. Reply
    Crystal in Texas / 3 May 2013 3:15pm #

    My sister actually bought one of those back in the day…we all thought it hilarious!

  3. Reply
    hotclaws / 4 May 2013 6:25am #

    They are still about,I was given one not so long ago.It’s frelling useless and got stuck in my long hair.

  4. Reply
    Thrifting Blog Digest-#50 | Late Night Coffee / 5 May 2013 2:04pm #

    […] When commercial art goes bad….Read here. […]

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