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Happy (mutant) Turkey Day!

Whatever your holiday plans are, the four-legged turkey does not approve. And he is an angry god.

10-16-11GWMetrTurkey1

In a way, this is appealingly minimalist. Just the turkey elements are preserved–horrible red wattle, seasonally colorful plumage (and I LOVE the purple, this must be one of those beautiful tropical turkeys I’ve heard so much about), wings. The rest is just pine, which is kind of a pity, there’s some good eating on the parts that fade into lumber, but such is life.

Colorful angry turkey: Tremble before his googly-eyed wrath!

10-16-11GWMetrTurkey3

In the spirit of the “hand-turkey” (instructions are here if you managed to avoid any elementary school craft sessions in the United States), his head is, basically, a thumb. And that’s okay, because all turkey’s heads are thumbs. And from my brief experience raising turkeys, thumbs are brighter.

But this isn’t about the head, it’s about the legs.

10-16-11GWMetrTurkey4

If there was a thanksgiving version of “Happy Feet,” this bird would either be cast on the spot for the lead role, or forcibly ejected from the studio. Three legs? Four legs? a cushion of legs like a centipede? Awesome. I wanted to say “think of the drumsticks” but frankly, they look missable, more like buffalo wings than the big RenFest drumsticks my family fights over. Sure, everybody can have one, but they’ll be hungry afterward.

To my Statesian friends, have a lovely day and enjoy your food coma!

Goodwill on 183 and Metric, Austin

November 22, 2012   TV's Jacob
Uncategorized "handicrafts", aminals, bad art, Holiday Posts, Thanksgiving

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2 Responses to “Happy (mutant) Turkey Day!”

  1. Reply
    Brunettepet / 22 Nov 2012 8:33am #

    I think the artist was trying to convey a turkey in motion but I’m probably giving them too much credit! Happy (mutant) Turkey Day!

  2. Reply
    Diana / 2 Dec 2012 8:52pm #

    this post made LOL-ed all the way to the end!

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