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Stupid zebra tricks

Because sometimes the lions of the savannah have a morbid sense of humor.

5-15-11GWMetrZebra3

Many dancers would be amazed at the sheer amount of poise and self-control this zebra has. Not just anyone has the willpower to remain en pointe after having one’s legs, and, more importantly, head removed. That takes dedication.

5-15-11GWMetrZebra1

Of course he’s cheating a bit, using that old stump as a brace, but it’s still an impressive trick.

One of the great “chicken and the egg” questions about Goodwill is, is the truly shameful amount of broken, totally unsellable junk on the shelves collateral damage from careless shoppers, or were these things donated like that? If it’s the latter, I want to see the pricing guide for “Zebra, Maimed.” Maybe it’s 60% off if 70% is missing?

I have my eye on a set of coffee mugs at Parmer and I35–it’s listed as $15/Set, and every week it comes closer to “$15/mug.” Maybe there’ll be a small fanfare when they reprice the silly things.

Anyway, maimed zebras.

5-15-11GWMetrZebra1

Savannah legend held many strange tales. Like the story of the hyena that invested large amounts of its personal fortune to a venture capital firm and made a modest income off a small software startup in Senegal. But when the sun set, the old men told of the dark night when fear galloped with a clip…clip…clip… and a conspicuous absence of a whinny. No-one who saw Striped Midnight could ever be the same.

5-15-11GWMetrZebra4

Goodwill on Metric and 183, Austin

January 14, 2012   TV's Jacob
Uncategorized aminals, broked

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5 Responses to “Stupid zebra tricks”

  1. Reply
    Brunettepet / 14 Jan 2012 1:42pm #

    Striped Midnight vowed revenge on this who’d maimed her, but without sight or smell she was doomed to wander for all eternity. Or pretty much as long as a chicken runs about with its head cut off.

  2. Reply
    hotclaws / 14 Jan 2012 9:54pm #

    The Island Dr Moreau strikes again

  3. Reply
    Mat Tombari / 16 Jan 2012 9:40pm #

    The head is probably in the borrowers hunting lodge.

  4. Reply
    Kathryn / 24 Jan 2012 10:27pm #

    I had to put my computer down I was laughing so hard at this post.

  5. Reply
    Barbara Carpenter / 1 Apr 2012 10:04am #

    This is not good business sense. It just goes to show that some people in retail try to sell anything to anyone, e.g., used car salesman, and now thrift store clerks/cashiers. Can’t someone just throw this broken zebra away?

    Unless you like to cut yourself up, why would anyone want it?!

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