 Sometimes a man turns to the sun in the west, pulls back his hat, and screams in sheer, unadulterated horror at the wrongness of it all. When you’re on the great plains, and your only friend’s yer horse, and he’s gotten a restraining order and you can’t come within 500 feet…when you’ve eaten beans […]
So pretty much every level surface in my room is filled with…stuff. I do occasionally buy these dreadful things, and between that, the empty bottles from my meds and the carefully rinsed and cleaned sour cream tubs, that’s pretty much it so far as viable storage space goes, and it’s kind of an effort to […]
…And Easter continues to continue! Today’s rabbits are truly bottom-of-the-barrel beasties. Take this guy for example. At least I assume he’s a guy, he’s blue. The long eyelashes are a bit of a nod toward androgyny. The whiskers made of push-pins are a bit of a nod toward insanity. Overall, this is the face of […]
I was going to spend the entire week putting up my entire hoard of Jesuses. Then I considered my target audience, who are clearly on some pretty odd chemicals if they’re still reading this. So, I bow to their refined sensibilities, and present…this thing. For a long time, I thought it was some sort of […]
I really try to avoid the more bibulous holidays. The fear is not that I might blow all my money on some stupid useless purchase that I couldn’t even begin to explain the next day, or say something I’ll totally regret and have it come back to haunt me for years, or even that I’ll […]
Ugly birds. Ugly…dead birds. Once again, the panopaly of “things what Goodwill sells” continues to absolutely boggle the mind. This poor little guy looks like the cat had a few words to say about him. Not kind words. Words like “How did you get in there,” and “can I get you out,” and “are you […]
Of course you wouldn’t want to use a LIVING doghorse, because it would just turn around and eat all your bread. It’s a little-known fact about our necromantic neighbors to the South that at least half of all Central American agriculture makes heavy use of zombie doghorses. Without a steady influx of still-living doghorses to […]
“The crystal…the crystal tells me that you will eat…too much! And your children will…will…will fight over small things, like who got more little chocolates. The crystal shows me much of the holiday, much that might otherwise go unseen…you did not buy enough batteries for all the toys that will beep and make noise, and will […]
(Well, two horrid nativities and some filler.) I took a lot of photographs of nativities this year–and really, every year. I don’t know why–the little kids seem to enjoy rearranging them, shuffling pieces around, and I do think the sight of the entire holy family gathered ‘roud a manger to gaze upon a kid half […]
It’s the day after Christmas, and Santa always gets a bad case of the post-gift-frenzy blues. For one thing he’s in the north pole and it’s going to be night for like three more months. For another, no-one’s going to remember he even exists until November, which has got to be quite a downer. And […]