(It’s been a while since my last post here, work’s been challenging and I’m trying to figure out a balance of life/work/projects. Since Facebook started throttling my traffic Thrifthorror hasn’t gotten much traction, so I’m thinking of going to one really good post on Mondays, maybe more around the holidays.)
Easter is just around the corner, and that means mutant bunnies. Remember, a bunny isn’t just for Easter. It’s for splattering with so much paint that it looks like it has a bad skin condition. And a bloody nose.
THIS is what cosmetics testing on live animals does :( One ear shaved and covered with amethyst eyeliner, one daubbed in carmine, and a streak of Maybelline Red Dragon Kissable up the nose.
I don’t know what the green is. I think maybe he’s underripe.
Oh, work it, baby. Turn toward the camera. Now play it coy, hard to get. That’s it. Now…pout.
These next guys are either dogs, or bunnies. They might be dogbunnies, which…well, the neighborhood chihuahuas might try it, but rabbits are pretty fast, I’d think they could get away.
Was Easter on 4/20 this year? Because it looks like their baskets wereÂ not full of the little plastic squiggly grass, is all I’m saying. This was probably the year the Easter bunny got the munchies and ate all the malt balls.
Mmm. Malt balls.
There is clearly nothing going on in these guy’s heads. Which is why they’d make such great candlesticks.
Have you ever, you know, been holding an egg, and, like, it’s all covered withÂ colors? That’s got to mean something, man. I just woke up and myÂ ears were all purple, what’s that about?”
I was going to title this post “Spring Chicken” in honor of this guy, but I didn’t want to put him at the top of the post. Really. He’s pretty terrifying, I don’t want to face that stuff on a Monday.
Pot art is really its own category of bad. It’s a cheap medium. You give some kids tempera paint and terra-cottaÂ plant holders, and it’s wholeÂ minutes of fun. But then you have to sneak off to the Goodwill donation porch at like midnight and leave them there, thinking how you’re going to explain it if there’s someone there after hours.
“Oh, this? It’s my daughter’s chicken pot. Those kids, and their…uh…bird pots…”
Really, it has no good side. But it does have a worse side. At least this way it isn’t staring at you, pleading. “If you don’t take me home, at least do me the small mercy of pushing me off this shelf. Let me end it all in a crunch.”
I have no mouth, yet I must peep…
textPainted bunny, Goodwill on 2222 and Lamar. Stoned Hares, Salvation Army on Anderson Mill and 183. Chicken Pot, Goodwill in Round Rock.