This…this is a useful metaphor. No matter how safe you feel in your pope-style force bulletproof bubble, even the one with the padded floor, the only sure thing is that we’ll all fall off our big brass hook–okay, it gets a little muddled, not sure what that means–and lose a leg. Maybe it’s behind the couch. Sometimes mine ends up there.
This is also a useful lesson in “why reindeer don’t actually fly.” Particularly ceramic reindeer. You can actually see this exact piece on a shelf in the Grinch’s cave.
A lot of things come into Goodwill broken. People donate all sorts of crap. Much of it gets thrown into giant bins, which isn’t GREAT for ceramic figurines. And then it gets put on eye-level with ill-supervised four-year-olds who are passionate destroyers of many different things. So it’s hard to say whether someone told their accountant “Flying reindeer ornament, donated 12/2/13. Value: $327. Small imperfections increase authenticity” or whether someone picked the reindeer up, looked guilty, and shoved it under a reindeer dome before slinking off to textiles. Either way.
It wasn’t that big of a fall. Quit being such a baby, Donder. Get up, we’ve got presents and a big fat man with a cookie problem to move.
Donder?
Oh, hey, found it! Would have lost it if it weren’t attached…oh.
Goodwill on 183 and Metric, Austin
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