ThriftHorror

Recent Posts

  • Interrupting your silence for an update!
  • Rabbit Season!!
  • Dolphins in Bondage
  • From the ‘Creepy Little Dead Girl’ Files
  • Putti: Creepy as F***

Recent Comments

  • Hannah Theresa Weyland on Just stand still.
  • Brunettepet on Can’t sleep, birdhouse will eat me
  • hotclaws on And another enigma.
  • Brunettepet on Well and truly fired
  • Brunettepet on A beautiful mystery!

Tags

"handicrafts" (tm) 12 Days 2010 12days2011 12days2012 12days2013 12days2014 aminals amorphous blobs angels bad art Bears Best Of biohazard bottles broked candles ceramics children Christmas clowns Country Crafts DIY dolls don't wear that! for the kids furries Halloween Holiday Posts horrors huh? it must be bunnies Just Cool juxtapositions kittens moments My Funny Valentine? Not PC NSFW plates puppies San Antonio shelfpig shell art Weird Religion

Best of Thrift

  • Next To New Consignment
  • Top Drawer Thrift
  • Treasure City Thrift

Blogness

  • Rewind Knits and Crochets
  • Thrift Madness
  • Thrift Store Adventures
  • Thrift Store Horror
  • Yardsaling to Adventure!

Links

  • RSS Feed
  • Thrifthorror on Facebook
  • Thrifthorror on Pinterest
  • ThriftHorror on Twitter

Every hour is Jesus hour

Take, drink. This is my V-8, which I have bought and decanted for you. Mix it with Smirnov Vodka in remembrance of me.

It’s happy hour, Friday, and the savior said he was buying the drinks. He didn’t mention ANYTHING about his blood. And, for the record, JC is a mean drunk. After two or three shots, his halo starts zapping everybody with tiny little cold rays, AND he flirts with the waitress, and you’re like, “Oh, no, He didn’t.”

11-10-11GW2222Jesus6

The son of God…

is…

a wookie.

11-10-11GW2222Jesus1

True story: Jesuses actually ran in vast herds across the Sinai peninsula,  until they were nearly exterminated for their soft, soft pelts. That scene at the end of Jesus IV: A New Hope, where the soldiers were throwing dice for Jesus’s coat? Yeah, don’t think too hard about that.

11-10-11GW2222Jesus8

That’s…very convincing blood. Is all I’m saying.

11-10-11GW2222Jesus7

“When we are reunited in Heaven, you shall sit at my right hand!”

“If it’s all the same, master, could I sit at your left hand? The silver rays really sting. Verily, they are like a plague of tiny angry wasps, and I am afraid.”

“…THOMAS shall sit on my left side, then.”

11-10-11GW2222Jesus2

Is that Judas? He’s…he’s kind of cute! It’s obvious there’s some kind of weird masochistic game at the table–see who has to look away from the halo-rays. The winner gets to sit at his left side. Loser picks up the tab on the bread and wine, and The Other James can really put away the unleavened, I’m just saying.

11-10-11GW2222Jesus3

I’ve so got this…Judas’s already lost, and he’s, like, frikkin AWESOME at “don’t blink at the Savior…but how long is Jesus going to do this? He’s only had two martinis tonight, he can’t keep it up forever…

11-10-11GW2222Jesus4

Why don’t *I* get any holy light? How come Peter gets all the holy light? I’m, like, TWICE as devout as Peter. 

The non-holy-light side of the table looks distinctly bored. It’s like Jesus is the most awesome disco ball in Israel, and they were a day late for 70’s Night. This is what happens when you don’t light your lamps and sleep through 70’s night, people.

Goodwill on 2222 and Lamar, Austin

March 25, 2013   TV's Jacob
Uncategorized bad art, Weird Religion

Related Posts

  • LET THERE BE….LIPS!
    LET THERE BE….LIPS!
  • Tell me why (I don’t like Mondays)
    Tell me why (I don’t like Mondays)
  • Steve.
    Steve.
×

  • Tiny Shell Warrior
  • Random Jesii

2 Responses to “Every hour is Jesus hour”

  1. Reply
    itza / 25 Mar 2013 7:41pm #

    Holy crap! This creation is AWESOME!!! ;D

  2. Reply
    hotclaws / 26 Mar 2013 1:32am #

    One of those guys on Jesus’ left looks like Thor ,just sayin’.

Leave a Reply

Cancel

  • (will not be published)
Copyright © 2013 ThriftHorror - Things From Beyond the Bargain Bin: Monday, Wednesday, Friday, powered by Wordpress
7ads6x98y