Imagine a prehistoric, paleolithic used car salesman. “Sir, I wouldn’t sell you this triceratops unless I BELIEVED in this triceratops!” For your edification, we, and Goodwill, have brought to light a bust of this very specimen.
There’s a sort of Book of Genesis quality at work here, as if he was Adam, rough-formed from the clay by the hand of God. In fact, you can see the places where his thumbs left big squishmarks in the poor guy’s torso, presumably when God created Adam’s head by squeezing really hard to see what popped between the gaps in his fingers. It’s a small blessing that he’s not, like, three giant wedge-shaped lumps or something.
The eyes are throwing me, here. They’re not subtle. Personally I would have gone for a bit of delicate linework to define the iris, not reached for the fruit-corer. But to each their artistic medium. It is clear that this guy is not a man for pansy-ass fine lines and detailwork. Grab clay, squeeze out head, gouge eyes. BAM, done. Take that, Da Vinci.
Unfortunately, his beard broke off. I hope it was an awesome, curling full-on Jafar. He deserves no less.
In the woodlands of ancient, mythical Greece, nymphs and dryads lounging in their shaded glens and brooks would see this guy coming, with this EXACT facial expression–and the full beard, not the post-Goodwill beard–and would turn in their immortality membership cards, on the spot.
Goodwill on 183 and Metric, Austin
One Response to “A face only a…oh, never mind”
It’s the Lord Kitchener of trolls.