ThriftHorror

Recent Posts

  • Interrupting your silence for an update!
  • Rabbit Season!!
  • Dolphins in Bondage
  • From the ‘Creepy Little Dead Girl’ Files
  • Putti: Creepy as F***

Recent Comments

  • Hannah Theresa Weyland on Just stand still.
  • Brunettepet on Can’t sleep, birdhouse will eat me
  • hotclaws on And another enigma.
  • Brunettepet on Well and truly fired
  • Brunettepet on A beautiful mystery!

Tags

"handicrafts" (tm) 12 Days 2010 12days2011 12days2012 12days2013 12days2014 aminals amorphous blobs angels bad art Bears Best Of biohazard bottles broked candles ceramics children Christmas clowns Country Crafts DIY dolls don't wear that! for the kids furries Halloween Holiday Posts horrors huh? it must be bunnies Just Cool juxtapositions kittens moments My Funny Valentine? Not PC NSFW plates puppies San Antonio shelfpig shell art Weird Religion

Best of Thrift

  • Next To New Consignment
  • Top Drawer Thrift
  • Treasure City Thrift

Blogness

  • Rewind Knits and Crochets
  • Thrift Madness
  • Thrift Store Adventures
  • Thrift Store Horror
  • Yardsaling to Adventure!

Links

  • RSS Feed
  • Thrifthorror on Facebook
  • Thrifthorror on Pinterest
  • ThriftHorror on Twitter

Welcome to Planet Goodwill

5-15-11GWMetrPlanet1

Planet Goodwill: Like Pluto, Planet Goodwill isn’t classified as a “real” planet. This is because so-called astronomers are not yet ready to wrap their fragile minds around a planet made of Styrofoam. Without their telescopes they’re so shortsighted.

Astronomers didn’t notice Planet Goodwill until 2006, because up until then it was eclipsed by a giant Persian cat. We still haven’t gotten a good glimpse of its presumably blue-green orb, but can infer its presence by its gravitational effect on the giant fluffy cat, occasional sightings of its sparkly blue-green moon “Savers,” and by spotting the sparkly stars that it occasionally sheds.

Distinctive features: Many planets have moons with eccentric orbits. Savers is actually nailed down to the planet’s surface with an amazingly, inconceivably large toothpick, large enough to spear 363 million olives. Its atmosphere, which is painted on, is dominated by a free-standing formation known as the “Great Green Smudge.”

5-15-11GWMetrPlanet2

It’s the lightest planet in the solar system, occasionally being blown out of its orbit by a stiff breeze, or by the aforementioned giant fluffy kitten. Nevertheless, Planet Goodwill’s importance in our understanding of cosmology and philosophy cannot be understated, because it’s the only planet that is actually signed by its maker.

Goodwill on 183 and Metric, Austin

November 28, 2011   TV's Jacob
Uncategorized "handicrafts"

Related Posts

  • Rabbit Season!!
    Rabbit Season!!
  • Inside an Angel
    Inside an Angel
  • Scary Santa’s Christmas Garrote
    Scary Santa’s Christmas Garrote
×

  • That whole “noble savage” thing
  • Would you trust this priest?

Leave a Reply

Cancel

  • (will not be published)
Copyright © 2013 ThriftHorror - Things From Beyond the Bargain Bin: Monday, Wednesday, Friday, powered by Wordpress
7ads6x98y