This here’s a little something from the “why did they frame that?” bin. And the “why did they donate that?” bin, too, which runneth over.
Odds are, nobody’s going to frame Grandpa’s EKG, and this PROBABLY isn’t a seismograph taken in Los Angeles before “The Big One.” This almost certainly is a printout of Baby’s First Heart Murmur. “Oh look, sweetie, he has your arrhythmia.” I would be much more impressed if the cheerful orange daisies lined up with the ventricular contraction. Frankly, the entire thing is just thick with shoddy workmanship. The next time Grannie embroiders tiny little floral runners to edge her grandchild’s heartbeat diagram, tell that old dame to show some EFFORT. Really.
…And then they give it to Goodwill. Of all the precious moments that you’d care to toss, this one tells a story of dashed hopes that puts any number of high school “LOVE YOU SHERRIE” oil paintings to bed without first base. I should have kept this one for the centerpiece of a dadaist “pro life” wall, next to the scary picture of Torso Baby and the Red Wagon. We always think of these things months too late.
Â Goodwill on 2222 and Lamar, Austin