…Of course, the LAST person to ask, “what’s in the cart?” That person we haven’t seen, not for a long time. People don’t ask that question much these days. They don’t ask where the jelly beans come from, they don’t ask about the colors on the eggs, and they don’t ask, “what’s in the cart?”
But you know, the out-of-towners, sometimes they don’t know enough not to ask. They think the Easter Bunny’s all about “hippity hoppity,” and “Here Comes Peter Cottentail.” And if there’s another song about the Easter bunny, they probably think that, too.
But before you throw too many questions around, mister…
You need to ask yourself, what’s it worth to me?
Do I want to be in the cart?
I didn’t think so.
I really must speak to our friends across the ocean in the great Easter Bunny manufacturing plants about their rabbits. I must talk to them about their rabbits with bloody, frothy muzzles, and how they are distributed to Easter shoppers across the world in cardboard boxes that obscure their horrible faces, and how people throw them in the “Goodwill” basket with the thought that, whether the damned thing gets purchased by some weird ironic hipster or tossed in the crap ceramics bin, at least it’s out of the house. I must talk to these Easter barons from across the ocean, and I must thank them. They do good work.
Tell me about flowers. Do they really come in all the colors in the world? Sometimes when I smell one, I can just about imagine what red smells like…
Cart bunny from Goodwill on 183 and Metric (and if I haven’t said it lately,”Thank you,” Goodwill on 183 and Metric. If you have some time for a drink or something, call me.) Red-muzzled bag-bunny from Goodwill on Stassney and Manchacha, blind, blind bunny from Texas Thrift, I35 near 51st Street.